Stop

Stop.

Fking.

Crying.

Fking.

Study.

Sabotage.

Brain will you give it a rest.

Heart has stopped already.

It is your turn.

Stop sabotaging me.

Let me rest.

Sincerely, the eyes and the soul.

Sigh.

Really want to talk to her.

"About what?"

Anything, nothing.

"So you have nothing to talk about."

...

"Go study you fool"

Tears.

Tears. Forcing myself to cry. It feels better afterwards.

Ender.

"They were good honest men. Even when they were hated and despised. Even when they lied through their kushaks. They loved you children. They did all they could without compromising themselves."

Success.

Then why does it hurt.

It is going too well.

I can't sleep.

The path is set out.

The road is built of ice.

It is crystal clear.

Straight as an arrow.

It is growing under my guiding hands.

Each step brings it closer.

Then why does it hurt.

Why do I hate it.

Make it stop.

Pain.

My deliverance.

My curse.

Our salvation.